In Need of a Pointy Bra

Tonight was unusual. Since Laura's still training, Marianne wanted two servers, so she scheduled me to come in at nine to help. It's been a long, long time since I've begun a shift that late, and a long time since there've been two servers on a Saturday. The timing worked out alright, though, since we got a bit of a rush around nine thirty. By then I'd already told Laura of my plan to send her home early, and since she's coming down with a bad cold, she was anxious to see the plan work. I told her to just hang on to the tables she already had and I'd take all the new ones. Then we got the rush. I was running just a bit, but it was more of a power walk than anything, and she kept asking if I needed help. I was entertained. She doesn't have any previous waitstaff experience, but I've been doing this for a couple years now. Yeah, I had six tables come in within about fifteen minutes of each other, but the advantage of working in a bar is that drinks are easier and quicker than food, so it was no problem. It was good that I was there, though. It could have been messy otherwise with a rush and a new person.

Me: Hi guys, what can I get for ya?
Younger gal: Amaretto sour.
Guy: A Sunshine Wheat.
Me: (to other gal) And a Smithicks and water for you?
Gal: Yeah.
Younger gal: Wow, how often does my mom come here?

Donny: I practice Mexican Judo. 'Cause Judon't know if I have a knife, and Judon't know if I have a gun.

Me: (to older gent) Excuse my reach. (to younger gent) Here's your lemon drop martini.
Older gent: (smiling) Are you getting in my way again?
Me: Uh huh. I've been known to do that.

Every now and again I mention pick up lines, but tonight I heard a fantastic one and I don't know if it can ever be topped.
Guy: Isn't that the smallest phone you've ever seen?
Me: Yup, it's teeny.

A while back, I started lending Julia and her guy friend my Angel DVDs. Julia got hooked, her guy friend got addicted. He sped through the DVDs as fast as I gave them to her, and last night he finished. He's not pleased at the lack of a season six.
Julia's guy friend: I can't believe that's how it ended.
Me: Yeah, I know.
Julia's guy friend: In fact, I think I'm mad at you.
Me: Hey, I'm not the one who cancelled it.

K.C. didn't come in tonight. He stayed home with the flu, and so Donny was the substitute doorguy. At some point, whilst a patron picked a Madonna song on the jukebox, he mentioned dancing to Like a Virgin. Specifially, he kind of dared me to play it and said he'd dance if I did.

A couple hours later a weird guy plays monstrous amounts of ABBA and leaves some credits on the jukebox. I tell Julia what's up and select Like a Virgin. Meanwhile, the weird guy leaves, but there's still - I kid you not - almost half an hour of ABBA to come. So, we keep waiting and listening for Madonna. We do last call. I start putting up chairs. Donny heads downstairs to give Dave #2 a hand. Finally, Madonna starts singing. In perfect synch, Julia and I charge downstairs and tell Donny to come up and get on the bar. Which he does.

Now, seeing someone you know jump up on the bar and dance to Madonna is funny any time. However, when it's nearly two o'clock in the morning, the experience is especially hilarious. That's the most I've laughed at closing time since probably forever. I just can't help but wonder if we can get him to do it again... Maybe with a conical bra, even. That would totally make my day.