This is a collaborative blog. Well, let's face it, they all are. But, specifically, this one's a collaboration between me, my friend Camii, and sometimes my brother. Here you'll find waitressing stories, bar quotes, movie reviews, and the occasional cake.

Saturday, December 23, 2006

Vertigo, Pt. 2

No quotes today, nor movie things. Just a quick, "yes, I'm still alive," kind of post.

Well, I was wondering. So far it's been pretty reliable, but I was trying to be optimistic, thinking maybe I'd make it through this year with out getting slammed with a bug. No dice. For the past few years, sometime between December and February, I end up getting horribly sick. I'm not sure if it's a stomach flu or what, but it's damn reliable. Two years ago it struck in February, last year it hit the weekend right before finals (which ended up being a horrible mess - a two day fever over the weekend, followed by another handful of nasty vertigo days during finals). This year, it hit yesterday. I was up at five thirty in the morning, hunched over the toilet. What fun. Repeat roughly every half hour until around noon - that was my day.

Now that the throwing up is over, the vertigo has settled in. Used to be, my vertigo wasn't particularly tied to getting sick, it just cropped up whenever it wanted to. Now, only when I get sick. On one hand, it's nice because that means only once or twice a year instead of half a dozen or more. On the other hand, it means having to deal with throwing up and having a wicked case of the dizzies all at the same time.

What the hell am I talking about? Good question. I didn't even know until I was in high school. All I knew was that every now and again, I'd spend a few days having to be really careful about walking into bright lights, turning my head too fast, etc. It wasn't until my doctor sent me to an ear/eye specialist that I had a name to go with it, Vertigo. It's an inner ear problem that is infamously unpredictable, but which tends to lessen as the person with it gets older.

Put another way, it's kind of like getting migraines in that movement and bright light tend to be bad things. Instead of pain in the head, though, I get bouts of feeling like someone's grabbing my head in one hand, my stomach in the other, and squeezing with both. Not fun. Each time veries in its severity, one time I couldn't sit down or stand up without having to hold onto something. Other times, it's just a brief moment here and there. Fortunately, this time is fairly mild. Still a pain in the ass, but it could be worse.

Added bonus: computer monitors for some reason really aggravate it.

Thursday, December 14, 2006

Amateur Night

“Ali,
I found this an interesting paper; informative. However, as I said before about this particular paper, the burden is on you to convince me that you have demonstrated theoretical sophistication in your approach. I don't neccesarily see a lot of that here.”
Dr M – Emailed comments on the rough draft of my final paper.

This is a verbatim quotation. I decided to keep the spelling error intact. Yeah, it’s kind of petty, but my irritation level feels it’s warranted. Let me just do a brief rant here – How the fuck does his reply help me? It’s a fifteen page paper. What does he mean by theoretical sophistication or how I’m lacking it? I don’t have the first fucking idea. Oh yeah, and the “as I said before” – he didn’t. It was a different paper he made that comment about. I told him what I wanted to do for my final and he said “I think that’ll work.” Dumbass.

Let me qualify – In his description of what he wanted in our final papers, he said “Three different critical approaches, stay away from jargon. I should be able to tell what you’re talking about without it.” Okay. So, I took that to mean that instead of saying “Now I’m going to take a Marxist perspective,” I should say, “One central theme that is illustrated through dialogue is the economic, and therefore class, differences between the characters.” Apparently, that’s not sophisticated enough. Why? Fuck if I know, he sure isn’t saying.

Of course, I thought it’d be more helpful to talk to him in person about my paper anyway. However, when I stopped by his office during his office hours yesterday, he was not to be found. I sat down and waited for nearly an hour, doing critiques for my writing group to kill the time. He never showed. Ditto that when I checked back a few times later. I had to resort to e-mail, because the man himself was nowhere to be fucking found. Notice the plethora of F-word, eh? I like it when I’m frustrated and angry.

My reaction, after the expletives, was a general “screw it.” I went back to my paper, added a few sentences to make things more blatant, and called it good. It’s now printed and ready to be handed in. I’ll do no more to it for his benefit. Sorry, I’m just not going to.

In related news, last night at the bar was what Dave called “Amateur Night.”

I really wanted to start this post off with a Dave quote from last night, but I couldn’t remember anything exactly. The closest I can get is him remarking on the urge to break faces. Dave is a fifty-three year old bartender. He is very laid back, makes a lot of jokes, and doesn’t get riled that often. He also is very big on courtesy. So, when Dave makes a comment about wanting to maim people, you know it’s no ordinary night.

For some reason, shit heads flocked to the bar last night. Mostly they were my age folks who didn’t know how to tip – or were asses enough to just not. Some tipped poorly, some didn’t tip at all. My favorite example: A very obese gal sat down, had a drink, had some dinner, and when her friends joined her, had another drink and more food. She gave me a credit card, and the slip looked like the following:
Subtotal: $20.00
Tip: $0.00
Total: $20.00
Adding to the bitchiness, and generally topping things off, was a note at the bottom. It read: [No Tip]. What the fuck? I didn’t ignore her. I didn’t make fat jokes. I was pleasant and gave her the shit she asked for. Her friends paid for their own drinks and an appetizer each, both left me a few dollars tip. Did she just figure they were tipping me for her? I mean, what the fuck?

It wasn’t just the youngsters, either. Later in the evening a large group of middle aged folks came in. Some had food. They mostly tipped like shit too. One couple had drinks and hot wings, I got them a box to take the extra home.
Subtotal: $15.00
Tip: $0.00
Total: $15.00
They left a dollar on the table. Do people realize how insulting it is to have a less-than-%10 tip? Or are they just being assholes?

For a good three or four hours straight, I was running from one table to the next, to the bar, and back again. My total sales for the night were $912 and change. That is the most I’ve ever done in one night. Somehow, I got enough decent tippers to almost balance out all the assholes. So, even though it was a pain-in-the-ass night, I made okay money. The fantasy football guys helped, they’re pretty nice and leave a good tip. So did the gal from the Christmas party and Rob and Melissa. Rob and Melissa are regulars and Melissa’s a student at the university. They’re nice and I usually chat with them a while when they come in. It was good they came in yesterday, because by the time they did, I was getting very pissed with everyone else.

*Deep Breath*

Okay, I think I’m better now. Really. It helps when I remind myself that, since I made extra cash last night, I’ll let myself spend more on Sunday when I go up to The Bead Gallery in Springs before the writers group meeting. I’m hoping The Bead Gallery proves worth the trip to the north side of the city.

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Whew

"Another aspect of residual orality present in Austen’s novel is the fact that, at the time it was published, Austen knew many of her readers would not experience Pride and Prejudice as text at all, but through someone else reading aloud."
-Me, Final Paper (15 Pages)

After staring at a computer all day yesterday, I finally finished it in time for my 5:30 class. It gave me a headache and made me tired - some of which is still lingering today. That's all, thank you.

Saturday, December 09, 2006

Young Guns & Bad Tippers

"Dirty Steve" Stephens: Damn good riding with you, Chavez.
Chavez: Many nights, my friend... Many nights I've put a blade to your throat while you were sleeping. Glad I never killed you, Steve. You're all right...
-Young Guns

Here we are, almost at the beginning of Finals Week. It’s crunch time. I’ve got a 15 page paper to write (mostly from scratch) by Monday. Instead of writing it, what am I doing? Checking my e-mail, updating this blog, and getting ready to go to the store for Christmas presents. Hey, I still have two whole days before the paper’s due, I can procrastinate if I want to. The upside of this crunch? Once I finish the paper for Monday, I’m done. I’m giving the exact same paper to both of my professors. 1. I don’t want to put the effort into writing a paper just for my Lit. Crit. Class. 2. He likes the papers I’ve written for my other class better than those I write for him anyway.

I’ve come to the conclusion that, even without my campus job, four days at the bar in one week is a bad thing. Ugh. I still have to go back there tonight, too. Damn drunks. Damn drunks who don’t tip.

Word to the wise: If you have enough money to go out drinking, you have enough money to tip. Period. Otherwise – keep your ass at home.

I don’t bring drinks to the drunks for my health. I do it because the bar owners pay me only a few dollars an hour and anything else comes from tips. I can’t pay my bills on my hourly wage. I need tips. It’s that simple. Also, a reasonable tip is a dollar for the beer I bring you, or 15-20% of a tab. People who get a $20-$30 dollar round of drinks and give me a dollar piss me right the hell off. People who don’t tip at all make me want to be violent. You know why they don’t make eye contact when they’re stuffing my tip into their pocket? Because they know they’re being a Shit Head.

Last night, I had a table of four ladies. They paid for their drinks separately and while some tipped okay, others did not. They paid for the food together. $19.27 for the food. They set out $20.00 for me. One of them told me to keep the change. Like there was any fucking way I was bringing back change anyway. Bite me, Ho-bag.

See where the disgruntlement comes from? See why I’m going to college? See why I have an aversion to going to parties where I know people will be getting drunk? Any previous aversion I had to dumbass drunks was only strengthened by working at a bar.

Next week, fortunately, I’m only there two days. This is good. I probably won’t have to kill anyone.

Movie Review: Young Guns. Lots of names I know, like Keifer Sutherland. Weird to see them young. Otherwise, it’s pretty weak. I worked on a loomed bracelet for Julia while watching and looking away from the TV to focus on the beadwork was no big sacrifice. That said, it was kind of fun in a hokey way. Gotta love the obviously 80's score. The Billy the Kid plotline was interesting. Favorite character: Chavez.

Monday, December 04, 2006

9 Degrees, Bar Overload, and Garp

T. S. Garp: (After a plane crashes into a house the real estate agent is showing Garp and his wife) We'll take the house. Honey, the chances of another plane hitting this house are astronomical. It's been pre-disastered. We're going to be safe here."
-Robin Williams, The World According to Garp

Finally! The day’s high will be well over freezing, instead of the below it’s been for almost a week now. Snow will melt, the roads will clear. Hoorah! I’m so happy, it’s not even funny. Yesterday it was nine degrees when I went to the store to get groceries. Nine bloody degrees! It’s not pretty when you have single digit temperatures. Over the course of the week, my car door has frozen shut three times. Can you see why a high of forty-five has me excited?

I just got a call from Kiera.
Her: “Want my shift tomorrow? Midori has her Christmas pageant tomorrow.”
Me: “Okay.”
A few days ago, I was scheduled to work at the bar two nights – Wed. and Sat. Then I said I’d pick up a shift on Friday because Megan couldn’t work. Now I’ve agreed to a Tuesday shift. Four days of waitressing in one week. I’m not excited about that, even though I volunteered. Still, since I’m now on hiatus from the campus job, I can use the money. Especially since Christmas is fast approaching. Christmas, and Christmas shopping. All accounted, I have a light burden – only three people (mom, dad, brother) on my shopping list. Keith and I are planning to do something together in lieu presents, like taking a mini-trip to Estes Park, which still requires moolah.

I’m just glad I’ll have Thursday off, a chance to recuperate. Technically, I have class that night but I’m thinking about skipping. Wait, I can’t. Thursday we’ll do our instructor evaluations and there’s no way in hell I’m missing those for this class which I loathe. Get this – last class I got a paper back that had the comment “Not bad, but what theory are you using?” I went to the prof. and said “About that, I was using Formalism.” He replied, “Well, at this point in the semester, I expect you to do more than that.” The thing is, he never bothered to fucking tell anyone that his criteria had changed from what he said at the beginning of the semester. Maybe on the evaluation I should make the comment that he needs to add to his syllabus that students must exhibit psychic abilities. See? See why I’m frustrated as hell with this class?

Movie Review: The World According to Garp. Any movie that opens on a scene set in 1944 where a young woman is holding an newborn and telling her parents “I didn’t need his [wedding]ring, I needed his sperm” automatically wins my respect. Even though the plot wanders and characters develop in spurts and stops vs. in a followable way, I had to keep watching. Glenn Close’s feature film debut has great odd-ball value and some very wonderful lines. Add John Lithgow as a transsexual ex-football player, and it verges on hysterical in parts. I keep wondering what the movie missed that the book had, but overall, it seems they did an all right job of making a fun movie out of a novel. It’s worth a watch, especially if you have good popcorn and nasty weather outside.

Thursday, November 30, 2006

First Snow

Father: [comes into room after gunshots are heard after an arguement with his wife] Hey, champ... pack your bags! We're going on a little trip! To DISNEYLAND!
Son: Is Mom coming?
Father: DISNEYLAND!
-Robot Chicken

When I woke up this morning, I turned on the TV and the morning show weather man told me it was two degrees outside. Which was up from an hour earlier when the temperature was negative two. (Insert expletives here). Only a few days ago, it was sunny and warm. Lovely weather on Thanksgiving, almost nice enough for shorts and a T-shirt. Now there’s snow on the ground, ice on the road, and it’s below zero. Bastards.

Urgent news: Robot Chicken is FUNNY.

Other news: I’ve officially decorated for Christmas – easy to do since all I have is a four foot artificial (pre-lit) tree, a gold garland for my entertainment center, and a wreath. Viola! Christmas! Of course, I still have to do the shopping part. Still, I’m part way ready for the holidays.

TV Review: Queer as Folk. It’s over, *sigh*. You know, in five whole seasons, it never got stale? I think it helped that every season after the first had only 13 or so episodes. Still, top notch TV making.

Movie Review:
Straight into Darkness. I had misgivings as soon as I saw the title. They were fulfilled. A film festival wonder, this movie ended up amazing me. What did the Milan film festival see in it? Granted, it’s bizarre, but is that enough? I guess so. Moronic plot, shallow characters, and a dumbass premise all gather together to create this movie that leaves the watcher wondering, “What was the point of that?”

Movie Review: The Aviator. Not bad. Gets a bit weird in spots, a bit drawn out in others. Still, interesting. Makes me very curious about Howard Hughes.

Friday, November 17, 2006

Thwarted Plans

Me: There's a problem with my check.
Payroll office gal: (chuckles) What, they pay you too much?
Me: Actually, yes.
-Conversation, five minutes ago

This morning I made a list in my head of things I need to accomplish. It looked something like this:
1. Write & Mail checks for electric, gas & credit card bill.
2. Pick up work study check from campus.
3. See a professor to get an article from her to summarize for my next paper.
4. Go to the bank.

All was going well, until I got to number two on the list. I went to the cashier, picked up my check, and thought, "That's not right." The check before this one was slightly short due to an error on my part in filling out my time sheet. So, I marked the difference on the sheet, had Katherine sign it and returned it to the payroll office. Instead of adding the difference to my current check, they repaid the whole month. So, here's the dilemma: Do I take the check to the bank, deposit it and count it a windfall? Do I bring attention to the mistake and return the excess money? I opted for the second one. Otherwise, I figure they’ll realize the error sooner or later and I’ll have to write them a check. Then again, maybe they never would have and I’d just have a little more money. Hard to say, really. In any event, I already returned the check. *Sigh* Now I have to make another trip to campus to pick it up.

This brings us to number three. My professor’s office hours are 10-12, MWF. I stopped by her office at 10:50 to find the lights off and the door shut. Why are things being so difficult today? Is there a particular force in the universe that’s decided I’ve been having too easy a time of it lately?

Movie Review: The Transporter. Fittingly, to go with the tone of the rest of the day, this movie was disappointing. When I saw The Transporter 2, and kept rolling my eyes at how insanely far-fetched Jason Statham’s stunts were and how ridiculous the plot was, well, I chalked it up to sequelitis. Little did I know… I mean, come on, the man hijacks a plane so he can jump out of it and parachute onto a moving semi. That, my friends, is pretty damn absurd. Granted, some of the fight scenes were nifty for their creativity, but it just pushes the believability envelope way too far. The high point: Getting to see a very buff Jason Statham without his shirt.

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Toilet Paper, Candles, and Pistols

“You got a nice little town here... GREAT PLACE TO DIE!"
-David Bowie, Gunslinger’s Revenge

Yesterday I did some shopping for necessities, toilet paper, and something for a housewarming present for Mishell and Michael. Since I know Mishell likes candles, and since Michael is in touch with his feminine side, I think I’ll make a candle/candle holder for them. A nicely shaped glass, some polymer clay, and viola! holder. Depending on what I find at Hobby Lobby, I’ll add wax and a wick to it also. I love going to Goodwill or the ARC store for glasses, they always have fun and oddball stuff.

Also yesterday, while I was taking a walk and thinking of how I’d get to working on the housewarming present when I went back to my house, I got a call from Kiera “Can you come in for me tonight?” Tough call, but I could use the green stuff, so I agreed. Poof! Crafting canceled on account of waitressing. The worst part was the fact that, thanks to a jazz band that played until almost 11:00 and the drunks who lingered after, I didn’t get to leave until midnight-thirty. Ugh. I got home, decided I would rather stay up just a little longer to take a bath than go to bed smelling of the bar, and ended up not getting to sleep until about 1:30. I was awake, thanks to my internal clock, by 8:15, which means I did not get my preferred eight hours of sleep. To top it off, when I got into my car, the put-on-your-seatbelt chime wouldn’t go off, so I got to drive with the *ding – ding – ding* all the way to campus.

In a fortunate turn of events, however, shortly after I arrived and got to my office, Nicole stopped by. Nothing like gossip to put a more positive spin on one’s morning. She finished watching Firefly this weekend, and I’m ready to return Queer As Folk Season Four (only one more to go!) to her tomorrow. I have this foreboding feeling about Season Five, too, because Season Four ended on, more or less, such a high note. Something bad is going to happen, I can almost promise you.

Movie Review: Gunslinger’s Revenge. A flippin’ hilariously bad movie. It has a few redeeming parts, like the turn at the “big showdown,” but is ultimately pretty stupid. Also not helping is the fact that whenever Leonardo Pieraccioni (Doc Lowen) spoke, his words and his mouth didn’t quite jive. It was also weird to watch a western made by Italians – speaking of things not quite jiving. Add a bit of David Bowie flamboyancy and hoo-boy, it’s absurd. Oh well, they tried.

P.S. Keith picked this one out, not me. :)

Monday, November 13, 2006

Dining Tables and Car Explosions

Michael: You can't open someone else's mail. It's a federal offense.
Hunter: I can see it now: I'm on Death Row awaiting a lethal injection. This mass murderer who killed 48 babies and ate them asks me what I'm being executed for. I say, "Opening Ben's letter."
-Queer as Folk, Season Four

Weird weather this morning. During the ten mile drive from home to campus, I went through an assortment of overcast, sunny, and very foggy weather. Odd stuff. It rained yesterday for a few hours straight in the morning, took a break, and rained for a few hours more in the late afternoon/evening. For the most part, it wasn’t too heavy, which was fortunate since my folks and I went out to Marianne’s mother’s house to pick up a kitchen table and chairs. She wanted to sell me some other stuff, but screw that, I refuse to give her any money. The kitchen table and chairs were free, and now they’re sitting in my kitchen, in place of a card table and folding chairs.

Movie Review: Mad Max. Talk about an over-rated flick. Egad. Throughout the movie I kept having thoughts like: “Why is that important? Why do I care? What was the point of that? Why is everyone mumbling?” Oodles of pointless explosions and car/motorcycle chases combined with people acting stupidly – see the scene where the baddies come after Mel Gibson’s wife, so he grabs a gun and runs off, leaving her behind. Dumbass. Mad Max is ultimately like Predator – dumb as all hell, but fun to make fun of.

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Finale, Disappointment and Cookies

Rat: I’d miss you if the human race died from pollution but rats lived on. So I’m dedicating my life to learning the science of preserving mankind.
Dilbert: Conservation?
Rat: Pickling.
-Dilbert

Well, ladies and menfolk, I’m now done with Season Three of Queer as Folk, and I’m hoping against hope that Nicole somehow picked up on my psychic brainwaves (as I forgot to e-mail her) that I want Season Four. I’ll find out pretty soon, since I’m going to class in about twenty minutes. Season finales are interesting things, what’s the right way to go about them? Big bang? Quiet moment? Something completely different? Queer As Folk did an excellent finale for Season Three. Fantastico! Both thematically and cinematically nifty. To see Liberty Avenue change to black and white, then back to color again ala The Wizard of Oz was just badass.

In other news, my mom made Farm Cookies for me, which are at the top of the list of greatest cookies ever. Think oatmeal, but with crunched up Corn Flakes and coconut. Mmm… Other good news, the newest issue of Realms of Fantasy came for me, and I’m taking it to class so I can read it. Ugh, I just looked at the Gallery section (usually one of my favorite parts) and it’s fairies. Please, people. Get original. Can we see some fantasy art that’s more than girlies? Oi. More Michael Whelan, please! He kicks ass.

On a final note: The bar is having kitchen problems, yet again. Last Saturday, Rob wanted part of the day off, so I was scheduled to cover the kitchen from 2:00 – 8:00. At 8:20, I called him to ask where he was. His reply – Denver, I’ll be there in about an hour and a half. Right. Wednesday, he didn’t bother to show up at all. So, in the five months or so I’ve been out of the kitchen (more or less), he’s the second to piss out. Now there’ll be yet another new person who’ll be learning the ropes, and I’ll be filling in meanwhile (yay for me, a pay-cut). Bloody hell, don’t people know how to keep commitments? Since they don’t, I get stuck being the good guy and doing something I don’t want to do. It pisses me off.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Kids & God

Carly: Ali!!
Me: (From the other room) What do you need?
Carly: I can’t see you!
-Conversation, last night

I’ve been babysitting for this family for about eight years now, since the middle child was still in diapers and before the youngest (Carly, age five) was even an eye-twinkle. I’ve babysat her since she was a newborn and it makes for a different dynamic. The parents are out of town for a few days, so I’m staying over. Carly is being a bit clinging since she’s missing mom. Oi. As much as I like the family and the kids, spending that much time playing mom always emphasizes why I don’t want to have my own offspring.

When I mention children to Keith, his response tends to be along the lines of: “If you ever have a kid, I’m leaving you.” An interesting thing to say, since he says nothing about me cheating on him, which creates the assumption that the kid he’d dump me over would be his own. An interesting point, yes, but ultimately moot. Just goes to show that, for all that I love Keith, he’s a stubborn ass on some points.

Movie Review: Bruce Almighty. When I was a kid, I liked The Mask. Otherwise, I didn’t think about Jim Carrey much. Now that I’m older, I think even less about him, with the exception of The Majestic – a pretty decent, if ultimately forgettable, movie. Anyhow, going into Bruce Almighty I wasn’t sure what to expect. The idea of literally playing God is interesting, and Morgan Freeman plays the Big Guy in a great way, but there are annoying over-the-top moments where Carrey whips out his trade-mark Ace Ventura gags. Ugh. Still, he was toned down. Overall, a decent movie – though, like The Majestic, I don’t think it’ll stick in my head very long.

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Movie Trio + Class-Based Whining

Turkey Creek Jack Johnson: Why you doin' this, Doc?
Doc Holliday: Because Wyatt Earp is my friend.
Turkey Creek Jack Johnson: Friend? Hell, I got lots of friends.
Doc Holliday: I don't.
-Tombstone

I finished Season two of Queer as Folk, and didn’t realize I had until I put the next disc in, only to realize it was all special features. I do like special features, but I wanted more episodes, dang it! Nicole is very entertained that she’s got me hooked. She’s bringing Season three to our Lit. Crit. class tomorrow.

Writers Group this month was fairly slim, only nine of us and only two fresh submissions. I slacked. I blame it on my classes. Yeah. It’s all my professors’ fault.

Great news! Slither is now out on DVD. It’s hilarious, gross, and full of innuendo. Watch it! Oh, the wonderful lines. Full of colorful language, for sure, but very, very funny. Nathan Fillion is, of course, wonderful. Keep an eye out for nifty DVD extras, such as a behind-the-scenes tour with Nathan and a clip of cast & crew ragging on him, saying how horrible he is (mundo funny). There’s also a neat clip showing the different stages of some visual effects.

Movie Review: Tombstone. Oh, I love this movie. It’s everything a great western is – funny, gritty, and full of great lines. Watch out for Doc Holliday (Val Kilmer), most of the things that come out of his mouth are just great, like, “You are a good woman. Then again, you just might be the antichrist.” Kurt Russell, Bill Paxton, and Sam Elliot are featured as the Earp brothers and do great jobs being generally tough bastards – particularly Russell and Elliot. Keep an eye out for a Charlton Heston Cameo.

Movie Review: Tristram Shandy: A Cock and Bull Story. The period parts were fun, the “behind-the-scenes” bits were mostly boring as all hell. Makes me curious to read the novel – which, since it’s assigned reading for my Lit. Crit. class, is probably a good sign.

Thursday, October 26, 2006

West Side Snoring

"Although "West Side Story" was named the best picture of 1961 and won 10 Academy Awards, it is not much mentioned by movie fans these days..."
-Roger Ebert, http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20040215/REVIEWS08/402150301/1023

We've been hearing for a few days about this big nasty blizzard that was going to hit last night. Co. Springs got nailed and everything is closed - even the Air Force Academy. Here in P. Town it just began snowing (instead of raining) around 9:30 this morning. We may get nasty weather yet. My class tonight's been cancelled, which is great. Now, all I have to do is find Nicole, trade her Queer as Folk DVDs, then go home and watch Season Two. Couch, here I come!

Movie Review: West Side Story. I watched the famous movie last night, sorta. I ended up fast forwarding a lot and skipping entire scenes. Classic movie, eh? Bah. Not that good. Ebert's review pretty much says everything I would, except unlike him, I didn't give a fig about all the dancing. A moment here and there and it was fun, but egad - if I wanted to see the ballet, I'd go to the ballet.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Queers and Casanova

Brian: So in other words, for Justin to live here with you, he has to deny who he is... what he thinks... and how he feels. Well, that's not love. That's hate.
-Queer as Folk, Season One

Good news! The gal at work who I have a hard time standing gave her two-weeks notice and will no longer be at the bar. Hoorah!

On Friday night (the one I requested off but couldn’t get it because whiney gal – see above – swindled her way into getting it off instead) I went to work only to find out that the bartender who was scheduled for downstairs called off. Long story short, Jan said I could go home. Yeah, I ended up getting the night off after all, but only after I showed up and skipped the Hungry Eye reading because I knew I wouldn’t make it until 2 a.m. without a nap. Ugh. The bright side – Constance, Lynn, and Nicole were at the bar so I chatted with them for a while then went to Nicole’s to watch the pilot episode of Queer as Folk. She let me take Season One home and I did a Queer marathon. Now I need Season Two.

One thing I must say about the show is the writers are good. This is a show where they set up a situation and I think, “Now, if they were smart they’d do this,” and they do. It also pisses me off because a lot of the being smart means not resolving all the issues they bring up in a given episode, which means I have to watch the next one to find out what happened (except they bring up something else and don't resolve it so I have to watch another episode, and it just goes on like that). They really pissed me off, though, with the Season One finale. At the end of the episode, Justin is rushed to the hospital thanks to one of the students at his school taking a baseball bat to his head. We see him pulled out of the ambulance, blood everywhere. We see Brian sitting on a bench, also bloody. We see Michael come and sit by Brian, obviously worried. We see the credits. So, what happened to Justin?! Bastards. Of course, I know he lives, but damnit, that was mean of them. Luckily, since I’m doing the DVDs vs. watching it on real TV, I don’t have to wait months to get to the next season. Ha! I just have to catch up with Nicole.

Movie Review: Casanova. Yeah, um. No. Come on people, Casanova was a man-slut. “Rewriting” him as the man-slut turned loyal hubbie type is just wrong. Give me a friggin’ break. I love Heath Ledger, but this movie fell flat. Sienna Miller was good as Francesca, and Charlie Cox was cute. Ultimately, though, the plot conflicts were resolved too neatly, everything/everyone got matched up and tied in a pretty knot. Ugh. Get real. Yeah, the Masterpiece Theatre Casanova kicks this one's ass.

Guess what? I just looked up Russell T. Davies on imdb.com and found out that not only is he responsible for producing Queer as Folk he is also responsible for the Masterpiece Theatre version of Casanova! Funny ol' world, aint it?

Monday, October 23, 2006

How to Make Rouladen

If you google rouladen you can find dozens of recipes. Here is the recipe my mom taught me, courtesy of my german grandparents. Note: my mom makes them much wider than I do, entree size vs. appetizer size. I made these last night, letting them simmer while I watched Desperate Housewives. Mmm...

Ingredients:
Beef roast, approx. 1 & 1/2 lb.s
Bacon, approx. 1 lb
Pickle spears, 1 regular sized jar
Mustard, approx. 1/4 cup
Toothpicks
White wine, 1/2 cup
Water, 1/2 cup
Oil/butter, 1 Tbs

Slice the roast into thin strips, roughly as wide and long as half a slice of bacon. I like to partially freeze the roast before I cut it, that way it's much easier to get even slices. Cut the bacon in half (whole strips are usually too long). Cut the pickles in thirds.

Assembly: Lay a slice of beef on your prep. surface. Smear the top side with mustard. Lay a piece of bacon on the beef, then roll them up together with a pickle in the middle. Use a toothpick to secure the roll.

Once all of the rolls are assembled, put them in a large pan with the oil and brown them. Then add the wine and water and simmer for at least half an hour. Viola! Rouladen. You can eat them in civilized fashion with a fork and knife, or just eat them off the toothpicks (make sure you have a napkin handy, though).

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

'Twas a Dark and Chilly Day

"I got one foot stuck in paradise, another foot in the grave"
-"One Foot," Seven Nations

Last night it rained where I live and thirty miles north they got the year’s first snow storm. Today it was actually colder at 2pm than 10am. Go figure. Winter’s coming. ‘Tis the season when I wish I had a fireplace. I do, however, have hand-crocheted afghans that my grandma made, flannel bed sheets, and flannel PJs.

Gotta work at the bar tonight, and I’d much rather not. What I’d like to do tonight is go home and curl up on the couch with my latest Netflix DVDs and a cup of something warm to drink. Mmm… Instead, I get to go to work. Ugh. Still the worst of it won’t be until this weekend – which was remarkably like last weekend – when I’m scheduled for both Friday and Saturday. The up-side of this weekend is that I asked for Friday off, and since I didn’t get it, Marianne scheduled me for a short shift (5-midnight). The down-side is that my coworker for the night noticed, “But isn’t the person who gets here first (4 o’clock) supposed to go home first?”

“Yes, but I asked for the day off.”

“Well, do you think I could go home first, ‘cause I have a test to study for and I flunked it the first time, and I really need to study.”

“We’ll see.” (Nuh-uh)

The part that makes it worse is that this gal only works at the bar one night a week. If she was scheduled to be back Saturday, I’d send her home first without much thought. However, since I’m the one due back Saturday, I’m not feeling generous. After all, I’ve got school demands too. Also not on her side is the fact that she tends to whine and gives the impression, whenever she’s working, that she’d rather be anyplace else. A kind of bare-minimum type of gal who asks for a lot of favors but has yet to do any for me. *Sigh* Can you tell I don’t care for her much?

In other news, my CDs from CD Universe came. I now have seven more albums than I did yesterday, mostly Church, but also Eve 6, Seven Nations, Third Eye Blind, and Rusted Root. These are the first new albums (save one GBS) I’ve bought in six months, maybe more. It makes me happy to think I can go home and fill my stereo (holds 5-discs) with completely new music. Yay!

Movie Review: Beloved. I read the novel a few years ago in class and, from what I remember of it, the film is very true to the gist – if not quite every single detail – of the story. Danny Glover is great as Paul D, and Oprah holds her own as Sethe. Denver and Beloved were also cast well and the actresses deliver high-caliber performances. Watching the movie, I couldn’t help but think of certain parts of the non-fiction book Black Like Me, by John Howard Griffin. Though the book was written in the late 1960’s a lot of the same themes occur in both. The most striking instance is the scene in Beloved where Sethe kills her baby and one of the white men, who came after her to take her and her children back to slavery, calls her an animal. Griffin addresses the stereotype of African Americans as somehow subhuman, and basically says “Can you blame people for it when you’re the one driving them to it?” The event he’s talking about is different, but the principal is there. A good movie, but not for a superficial viewer.

Monday, October 16, 2006

Famous Literature Turned Movies

Henriette: The man of parts.
Giacomo Casanova: Many parts.
Henriette: Is that how you win over the ladies? Cheap innuendo?
Giacomo Casanova: No, you just make all my best lines rubbish.
-Casanova (Masterpiece Theatre)

Yesterday I slept in by about three hours. Then I took a nap later in the day. I’m still tired. Ugh. That’s what happens when I’m scheduled at the bar both Friday and Saturday from 5:00-2:00. I’m not sure how much of it is due to working until the wee hours of the morning, and how much of it is being on my feet the whole time, walking back and forth from tables to the bar, but it makes me very exhausted. It definitely didn’t help that on Friday I was awake and at the dentist’s office by 9:00 a.m. (the good news there is they fixed my cracked tooth for free).

I can’t wait until tomorrow, when I have a whole day to myself (in theory, anyhow) and I can be a bum. Yesterday was somewhat like that, but since I slept until noon and then Keith came over a few hours after, I didn’t have much free, by myself, time. Of course, tomorrow I really should do laundry, but I might have to procrastinate that, we’ll see.

Movie Review:
Beowulf and Grendel. A far cry from the staleness of the original saga as read in my Brit. Lit I class a few semesters ago, the movie makes the famous characters 3-D instead of 2-D. It also throws in some humor. I love many of King Hrothgar’s lines. While there are a few scenes at the beginning that probably could/should have been cut, the storytelling is pretty tight overall. Awesome scenery, costuming, etc. Gotta love the attention to detail with the helmets.

Movie Review: Casanova. After seeing this version of Casanova on PBS, and assuming it’s fairly accurate to the original tale, I’m at a loss for wondering what the heck the Heath Ledger version will do. I have to say, though, that I really like David Tennant’s portrayal (and Peter O’Toole’s) so Heath Ledger will have to work to overcome my bias – never thought I’d say that about him. Think about it, what kind of man could really pull of being one of the world’s most famous lovers? Where Ledger has the looks part nailed, Tennant’s performance was extremely endearing and you can’t help but like him. Although it's rather hilarious how these "venetians" have british accents and use british terms. Anyway, I’ll have to see them both before I can really start comparing. The Ledger version is at the top of my Netflix list, so it won’t be long.

Thursday, October 12, 2006

Jesus-Dog

"$72 dollars due"
-Dentist's bill I received yesterday in the mail (despite the fact that I paid, in full, the day I got the filling).

Netflix is pissing me off again. Most of the time when I send a DVD back, I get a new one two days later - i.e. I send one back on Monday, and get a new one Wednesday. However, they've fallen behind again. Last week I sent DVDs back on Fri. & Sat. Today, Thursday, is when I'm supposed to get my fresh DVDs. Almost a whole week's wait. Bastards.

So, for someone who doesn't have recurring dreams, I've been having a lot of them lately. One theme that keeps coming up is Highlander, the other is my now-deceased dog. Except, she's not dead in the dreams. In the dreams, I have a Jesus-dog. I know she died, yet there she is, alive and well. In one, it was like her death actually was good for her because she was healthier after she was buried than before. In another (which I had just a few days ago), not only was she alive and well, she had puppies. Of course, they weren't quite right - all hairless and pink with legs so small as to be almost invisible, in short, mammal catepillars. I think part of it is that, even now, when I go over to my parents' house, I still expect her to come to the door. I still find myself looking through the window for her as I walk to the porch. Every now and again, I even almost ask my mom how the dog's doing. It keeps making me sad, to think that I don't have a dog any more.

I wonder how long the dreams will last.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Maybe I'll Just Get Dentures

"I guess you've got the Eickholt teeth. By the time your grandmother was twenty, she had lost all of hers."
-My mom

I had a pretty good day yesterday. I had no work, no class, and Keith came over and we watched the Venture Bros. while lazing about on the couch. Then, at about eight thirty, I ate dinner and broke a tooth on some broccoli. It went like this: "Munch, munch, munch, CRUNCH - what the fuck was that?" This is the same tooth I got filled a few weeks ago, and now I have to go back to the dentist yet again to get the bastard fixed. (Making for three visits in one month) Fortunately, though, while the tooth is broken it is not causing pain. I'm really hating my teeth right now. I limit my sugar, even though I love sweets, try to drink lots of water, floss, brush well, etc. However, that's apparently not enough. Damn genes. Mom added, "At least you didn't get the Metzger gums." See? There is a bright side.

I called it a night around ten thirty and was woken at one a.m. because my phone was ringing. Keith was calling. No, it wasn't some kind of emergency, "You should come over to Jason's." Because that's exactly what I want to do - get woken up at one in the morning so I can go over to Jason's and hang out with drunk people. Don't get me wrong, they're nice drunks, but, well, screw that. I'm going to have to have a conversation with Keith about not calling me after eleven or so on week nights and not calling me when he's drunk (not to mention when both are the case). Dumbass.

Movie Review: Deliverance. Meh. I've heard a lot of people talk about how everyone should see this movie. I did, and I really don't see what all the fuss is about. The plot lacked cohesion and I didn't really understand what the point of the story was. I think my problem is that I lack testicles. That probably makes the movie better.

Cartoon Review: Venture Bros. Keith is an adult (not adult) cartoon affectionado, so every now and again I get subjected to things from Cartoon Network's Adult Swim. Yesterday, was Venture Bros. (A revisitation/satire of Johnny Quest) I had reservations going in, but I have to admit, the show is pretty hilarious. There's plenty of juvenile humor (lots of potty jokes), some obscenity, etc. Basically, it's not the most "intelligent" humor. However, they make some good digs - like a Fantastic Four parody - and Brock Samson is damn funny. When Keith left, I had only finished disc one, and I liked it enough to keep the box so I could watch disc two. Fun stuff.

Friday, October 06, 2006

Mrs. Dalloway, Highlander Dream, and Hysteria

"Holy Mother of Oats! I turn my back for five minutes (that's how long it takes to admire my lovely back) and the interweb goes banoonoos! Isn't there any ACTUAL news to get wrong? Sorry about all this; it might be best if I just stay off the computer for a while. Or just glut the feed with wild conjecture. Hmm, let's see... I'm me, so... let's glut! Here are some ABSOLUTELY TRUE statements of factiness. Gentlemen, start your websites..."
-Joss Whedon, http://whedonesque.com/comments/11513#144407

See? This is why Joss is my hero.

I had another Highlander dream the other night. That brings my total to four. It was about Duncan and Tessa in Renaissance Italy (or somewhere like it, anyway) except they weren’t in period dress. Duncan was trying to convince Tessa why he couldn’t love her, because she’s not an immortal and he didn’t want to love her just to lose her. Of course, the fact that part of the dream was the same argument, but in modern times, means that she lived a couple hundred years anyway, so the argument was more or less moot. *Shakes head* Don’t ask me what’s going on there.

Oh yeah, some school based gossip. There is a man in both of my classes who I don’t know well. When he speaks in class, he tends to say odd-ball stuff, but I didn’t think much of it. A few days ago, one of my friends (who is in this guy’s group in one of the classes) told me that while they worked together he made frequent remarks about how she, and the two other gals in the group, were hotties. He also made a lot of inappropriate remarks in group e-mails – one example is the time he e-mailed everyone a poem about boobs. No joke. Mind you, my retelling of the situation is not at all detailed and rather more G-rated than what my friend told me.

The point is, he made her so uncomfortable that when he sent an essay to the group about hysteria – i.e. detailing all the gruesome details of how it used to be “treated” (for those who aren’t aware, hysteric women were sent to the doctor and hooked up to vibrators or manually “treated” by the doctor) as in more porno than academic essay – that she approached the professor who he was going to turn the essay in to, and the professor told him it was not appropriate to share with the class (which is what we usually do). He did not come to class that night at all. So, my friend, that professor, and the chair of the English department are discussing the situation. We’ll see what happens.

In other news, I watched Mrs. Dalloway last night. Perhaps I was just tired, perhaps I was just bored, but either way I fell asleep before I got to the end. Basically, I missed Mrs. Dalloway’s actual party. Funny, eh? I thought about watching the last part again this morning, but couldn’t bring myself to do it. No interest at all. I haven’t gotten all that far into the book yet, but I’m thinking the fault lies in the structure. Namely, I don’t think it’s all that translatable.

Thursday, October 05, 2006

The Keith/Anniversary Post

"I love you."
-Keith

Unfortunately, that's how I've been for about a week now. I feel bad for Keith, since this is anniversary time and he's being all sweet while I'm being grouchy. He took me to dinner Monday at the steakhouse, and has made mention a few times of the fact that we've been together three years now, and it's still working well. In his words, "I'm not tired of you yet."

Also in his favor is the fact that he called me last night after I got home from work. He wanted to check on me because he knew I was miffed about what happened. It perked up my night considerably. He may not be the most diplomatic of guys, but he's a good one and I'm glad I have him.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Bar Frustration

Me: You shouldn't come to see me at work tonight.
Keith: Why?
Me: Because I'm pissed at the owner.
-Phone conversation

I'm beginning to be extremely excited about the fact that I'm working only one night this week. I got a call at something like 2:30 saying could I cover the kitchen tonight? The jist of my reply - I'd rather be on the floor, actually, so I can make $50 more dollars. The response - yeah, but no one else can cover the kitchen, so you have to.

I first said I'd do both, allowing for how busy it got. Then I realized I didn't want to do two jobs tonight. Because doing both would mean shutting down the kitchen, then going out to the bar so I could sweep and take out the trash. Fuck that. So, I'm just going to be in the kitchen. Hooray. Fortunately, I'm less pissed now than I was at first. When I called the owner back, she at least tried to compromise by saying she'd talk to the kitchen manager about staying late. Of course, the kitchen manager has a "prior engagement" and cannot. Just so you know, that means she doesn't want to skip her pool league. It's not like she should have to suck it up instead of me, I mean, it's not like she gets paid more, or is the kitchen manager or something. No, not like that at all.

The timing could be better, too. I'm already generally stressed thanks to being busy (in general), still in the process of moving and preparing for my party, and having had a very frustrating Saturday at the bar. It was slow from 5-11, then I had no tables for the following three solid hours, but could not go home because it was my job to stay and help close the place down. So, I sat around for three hours thinking how tired I was and how I had been cleaning my old house all day and how badly I wanted just to leave. It also didn't help that it was a night of stupid drunks. So, I was tired, and pissed, and pissed that I was tired...etc. Generally: very cranky.

Thus, we get back to today: doesn't help with the crankiness.

Joy for me - I get to go to my favorite class tomorrow. Damn, that perks my mood right up. Did I mention that I walked out early last week? It's going to be very hard not to do so again tomorrow.

All right, I can never stay bitchy for too long. I remind myself that I should have a movie and Highlander Season 2 Disc 6 waiting for me at home. Also, covering the kitchen means I get to leave earlier than I would if I were waitressing. That means, I can watch stuff tonight.

Monday, October 02, 2006

Moving, Movies (It's a comma splice)

“Everyone always leaves it trashed.”
-Landlord of old house

Moving. Ugh. That sums it up, really. I finally got rid of one house, yesterday, by returning the key to my old landlords. They were terribly thrilled that I had actually cleaned the place up. A first time occurrence, she said.

I also hung my numerous pictures, some are crooked, and none are even with each other, so it’s bugging me, but they are on the wall instead of in a pile on the coffee table, so I’m going to call it good for now.

Hollywood has been pretty disappointing lately, putting garbage like The Descent and Pulse up on the big screen, but in the past few weeks they’ve geared up for colder weather by opting for some decent flicks, like The Illusionist. Keith and I went to the theater Friday, and now I’ve seen two good movies, in a row, at the theater. Good God! In other news, my two latest Netflix flicks didn’t quite do it for me.

Movie Review: Flyboys. Where Geronimo got it wrong, this film gets it right. It takes a big historical story – that of the Lafayette Escadrille – and works into it a manageable and focused plot with developed characters. Here’s the gist: Take a handful of Americans, before America joined the war, who volunteer to go to France and be among the first ever fighter pilots. Make one of them James Franco, who plays a cocky ranch boy who plans to become the new unit’s first “ace” and add Martin Henderson (playing Reed Cassidy) saying his line about the average life expectancy for a fighter pilot being three to six weeks, and viola! The writers do a nice job of individualizing the characters, and creating a tight plot – they’re pretty slick about nonchalantly introducing elements that become important later on, so pay attention. Martin Henderson is mundo badass as Cassidy, and he and Franco have a nice mentor-protégé dynamic. Although a savvy movie-watcher will see the main plot arc pretty early on, there’s plenty of other good stuff to keep you watching. The fight scenes had me leaning forward, and that doesn’t often happen. Definitely worth a trek to the theater.

Movie Review: Donnie Darko. Cult classic. Demonic Bunny. Adolescent kid with a bit of mental illness. Sounds good, right? Eh. I can mostly see where they were going with the idea, but the execution left me not caring much. The movie plods along, making a point of “ain’t life weird?” and here and there dropping hints that there’s a plot, oh and characters. Jake Gyllenhaal wanders around acting either really weird, psychopathic, or very intelligent and sometimes sweet. They emphasize the mental illness a lot with, “see, he’s not right in the head” scenes that kept making me think, “Yeah, I get it already.” Of course, you get to the end and have the big twist, and then get to thinking about it and realize – but what the hell? If that’s what happens, then why does the rest of it matter? Dunno on this one guys. I salute it for its outright weirdness and the fact that they did something radical at the time, but for pure movie value, it fell short.

Movie Review: Great Expectations. This is the one with Ethan Hawke and Gwyneth Paltrow. As far as I can tell, most people are either really fond of it, or particularly dislike it. Me? The second one. I’m all about modernizing classic stories in movies, like the slightly corny and wonderful Bride and Prejudice, but only when they’re done well. This one wasn’t. I don’t mind that they change details, like naming him Finn instead of Pip. I do mind when they change random stuff for no good reason – like why the hell was Maggie a hooker instead of a bitchy housewife? I also mind when they miss the themes that made the original so enduring. The major one for me: in the novel, Pip’s miserable because he’s ashamed of where he comes from, in the movie, he’s fine with it and when he gets his “big break” he almost turns it down instead of jumping at it. I mean, come on, that’s practically the WHOLE POINT of the novel. Dumbasses.

Thursday, September 28, 2006

Firefly Time

"He robbed from the rich and he gave to the poor
Stood up to the Man and he gave him what for
Our love for him now ain't hard to explain
The Hero of Canton, the man they call Jayne"
-chorus, "The Hero of Canton"

Here's a holler out to all browncoats! It's almost Serenity's one year anniversary. I'm whipping out my Firefly box set soon, to relive the shiny episodes. Which reminds me, if you don't know the song I quoted above, you need to buy the Firefly box set.

A side note: Stupid FOX. FOX is cracking down on Firefly copywright infringements. It only took them five years to care, besides, if they had created any Firely merchandise, fans wouldn't have resorted to making their own. Maybe, though, this is a good sign. The show is actually important enough for the studio to get their panties in a twist over it. Read about it here: http://www.serenitystuff.com/2006/09/14/bluesunshirtscom-gets-a-c-and-d-letter-from-fox

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Feeling Overwhelmed

Richie: Mac, to hell with the rules. We're immortals, who cares about the rules?
Duncan: Sometimes it's all we have.
-Highlander, “Under Color of Authority”

Grand News – I moved into the new house last night. Dad was over fixing a few last things and he helped me move over my essentials (bed, TV, microwave) so I could spend the night. I watched Highlander (adios, for now, Richie) while sitting on my vintage couch, and set up my stereo and got one of my new plates dirty. It’s so exciting, let me tell ya.

It’s recruiting time for SCWP, so this morning I got over a dozen e-mails from Katherine along “Send 10 brochures to Joe at this address…” lines. I also got an e-mail in that batch saying all of the mailings needed to be sent out today. Between compiling addresses, making labels (the printer was down for half an hour), copying letters, and stuffing envelopes, my first hours in the office disappeared. Now, with all the mailings sitting happily in the mail bag, I am temporarily caught up on my To-Do list.

Plenty of other stuff to do outside of the office though. Alas, this week promises much more work. I need to finish moving, start unpacking, write a few papers for class, read a few books for the same, and follow up on some things I told people I’d e-mail them. Mostly, the moving is what’s sucking the life out of my week, though. Yesterday was theoretically a “free” day since my babysitting was cancelled and I had no other commitments. However, it got devoured by doing laundry and moving. Egad, how can I have so much stuff? My English major condition is starting to show, I had to move three boxes of just books, and one of magazines. Fortunately, due to my lack of electronics, the entertainment center is primarily acting as a bookshelf.

It is a very good thing I’m not working at the bar this Friday. Along with all the moving I need to do, I still have to clean the old house before I’m done. I’m very glad the old house is small. The utilities need to be switched over, and half a dozen businesses need to be notified of my new address. Oh, I should probably go grocery shopping sometime soon, too. It helps to have food. Ugh.

Monday, September 25, 2006

Christ and Couches

“Before you go, is there anything I can pray for you about?”
-gal on campus


On campus there is a big courtyard with a fountain in the middle and grass around it. It’s nice today, so I sat in the grass during my break. Within a few minutes, a complete stranger came up to me and started a conversation. I don’t particularly like being approached by complete strangers who want to have a conversation, especially when I’m doing something – in this case, sketching. She was good though, she jumped right in with questions about if I was an art major, if I lived on campus, etc. Super friendly but not obnoxious about it.

My general response to this kind of thing is to be antisocial about it, but since she wasn’t some drunk guy (as they’re usually the ones starting random conversations) I actually chatted with her a bit. I was still trying to figure out whether I was being hit on, or whether she wanted to evangelize me. Turns out, it was the latter. All else aside, I have to give her props for guts. Approaching random strangers to talk about religion is not for the faint of heart.

In other news: this past Saturday was a moving day. I didn’t get everything from one house to the other, but I did get all the big furniture and a good number of boxes. Everything else should fit in my car. The living room of my new house is starting to look homey, actually. With an entertainment center, a big red rug, my parents’ 20+ year old furniture (which is still in good shape and comfy), and a couple of afghans my grandmother crocheted, the room is getting cozy. As I told my guy Keith last night, I’m looking forward to being able to sit on my “new” couch with him to watch a movie. That’ll be very nice, since we were never able to do so in the little house with wicker furniture – not very comfortable for two people.

My brother came down from the AFA to help me move, and together we took my desk apart in record time and reassembled it even quicker – turns out it’s one of those jobs that goes much smoother with fewer people. I dropped him back off at the academy yesterday, but took him to my writer’s group first. He was entertained.

And now, for a meta-moment: I’ve been thinking about the blog, and about getting published, and such and I’ve decided to start an off-shoot devoted to writerly blogging. It’ll be my “professional” blog, or something. Henceforth, my comments about my writers group, my novel, etc, with mostly be found there. We’ll see how it goes.

Tried to Post This on Thursday, but Couldn't

"I am going to submit something. If it's not the best story I ever wrote, then it's definitely the worst one...or somewhere in the middle."
-Oliver

I'm tired, slightly cranky, and wanting little more than to go home and take a nap. Instead, I get to go to my favorite class and sit through three damn hours of it. There's a voice in the back of my head whining "I don't wanna, I don't wanna" and I'm having to fight pretty hard not to listen to it. Ugh. Fortunately, I have my sketchy book and my spiral notebook with me, so I'll at least have something to do during class. Also, Nicole's group is going to talk about Queer Theory (as in lit. theory) so I can pay attention to her instead of my idiot professor.

See what I mean about the cranky?

Okay, good news: Yesterday I had a zero-word count for this month's Oracle submission. This morning and at various time throughout the day, that changed to a 1,300-word count. While a significant part of me wanted to just skip this month - thanks to it being already Thursday and me having to work both Fri. and Sat. nights, and having to move on Saturday - but my recent acceptances are making me feel like a "real" writer, and real writers don't slack, they take their work seriously, etc. Besides, much of my procrastination can be credited to this next chapter being a somewhat uneventful (and thus less exciting) one. I mean, hell, I just killed off two of my main characters, it's hard to top that. Anyway, I'm pleased with myself and how I didn't slack.

I also sent e-mails to Jayne and Oliver (the young punkish, but talented one) saying they'd better submit because if I can, they can. This is, of course, largely motivated by the fact that Jayne and Oliver can at least write something I want to read, which isn't always the case with others of the group. So, if I have to wade through that stuff, I want a bonus of good stuff. The side effect, is that this works to further ensure I get my butt in gear and finish and submit this Sunday.

Other writerly news - Julia read my story last night and liked it. I said, "I wasn't sure what you'd think, since you dislike fantasy." Her reply was that she mostly dislikes popular fantasy, you know the mile-long unpronouncable names, magic that solves everything, etc. She caught a few typos for me, too.

Right, I'd best get going since I have twenty minutes before class starts and a paper to write yet.

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Research

"Leave out the parts people skip."
-Elmore Leonard, quoted by Spacesuits and Sixguns

Encouraged by my two flash fiction acceptances, I spent a few hours today on http://duotrope.com looking up possible publishing markets. Right now I'm only looking at those which publish in print and accept e-submissions. I had to narrow it down somehow, duotrope has a massive listing, and that seemed logical.

I'm getting ready to go to the bar. Julia's bartending upstairs today (2:30-close) and she just called to see if I would bring her the newspaper because she's bored to tears. However, I told her about the story I was working on last week and she asked to read it. I finished the rough draft on Saturday and have a copy with me, so we'll see what she thinks. I'm a bit apprehensive, though, because she's mentioned a dislike for fantasy, which my story essentially is. Then again, the fantasy element is pretty light, so it might not be enough for her to dislike it. We'll see.

Last fall, when I took my pottery class, I had to get a sketch book to sketch the pottery pieces I made. As soon as the class ended, the sketch book fell abandoned, but now I'm using it again. I do have a few sketches in there, but mostly I'm using it for possible story notes and publishing markets notes. Here's an example of some of my possible story notes:

Idea: Marriage to a secret figure
-idol marriage
(Humor) Woman chats with a carved wooden hubby
(Humor-or-Horror) Woman has baby from idol hubby

Image: Natasha Wescoat tree with people buried beneath it
-twisty/fantastic branches

Idea: Exotic trees that can only be fertilized by corpses.

Monday, September 18, 2006

Without the Sleeping

"Let me sleep."
-Dormer, Insomnia

I went to bed last night at something like 11:30. I got out of bed around 1:30. I spent the time in between turning from side to side and thinking to myself, "Okay, I'm feeling sleepy now. Really, I am." I finally gave up and went upstairs to sort through some stuff - namely, the pile of critiqued copies of Oracle I've accumulated. I also looked for, but did not find, the binder I've been using to store hardcopies of my poems & fiction. I think it's in one of the boxes I've already moved over to the new house. I set aside two short stories, a floppy disk, and a spiral notebook so I could bring them to campus with me today. Can you guess what I forgot? Yeah. I don't think it helped that I went to bed, finally, at about 3:00 am.

Yesterday, before the insomnia, I decided to go to the movie theater. Thanks to Netflix, being busy, and nothing but crap playing, I hadn't been to the theater in a while. However, they're starting to have some interesting stuff on screen now, like Hollywoodland and The Black Dahlia. Yesterday, though, what brought me to the theater was Edward Norton's latest flick. He picks interesting movies, and aside from 25th Hour, everything he's been in is worth seeing. The Illusionist is a prime example.

Movie Review: The Illusionist. Don't let the heavy antique sepia tones scare you, it and the fuzzy-around the edges look don't last. Creatively, I can dig where they were coming from with that, but as a movie viewer, it got a bit tiring. Luckily, like I said, it doesn't last forever. The darkness and color tones do interesting things to the overall feeling of the movie. It feels antique, and mysterious, and throws a mood over you that couldn't be replicated if they'd used more true-to-life colors. The plot is a bit tangled, one of those start near the end then catch up kind of stories, but it works well and cues you in to get ready to pay attention. Here's a bit of the gist: the movie opens with Edward Norton (Eisenheim) being grabbed by Paul Giamatti (Chief Inspector Uhl) and goes into the Inspector reporting to Rufus Sewell (Crown Prince Leopold). From there, we travel into flash-back territory where the love story is set up between Norton and Jessica Biel (Sophie) who's a duchess and thus out of limits. Flash forward about fifteen years, when the magician, the duchess, and the Crown Prince meet up in Vienna. Rufus Sewell is a perfect domineering bastard and Edward Norton is wonderful as Eisenheim. Paul Giamatti proves that he's one of those men who look better with facial hair than without, and walks a line between outright bastard and "good guy" beautifully. Most important, don't assume anything, and pay attention. The filmmakers drop a few hints here and there as to what's really going on, but they're subtle and easy to miss if you're paying too much attention to your popcorn. Go see this movie.

Movie Review: Geronimo: An American Legend. Lots of history, little story. It tries to walk the line in between documentary and interesting story and doesn't quite pull off either. Netflix says, "With close attention to period detail and historical accuracy, Walter Hill recounts famed Apache warrior Geronimo's losing battle with the U.S. Army in the late-1800s Southwest." The problem was that Hill got too caught up with the big historical characters and got into a kind of "wasn't this guy cool?" mode without picking someone particular and really fleshing them out. You'd think Matt Damon would be the guy, since he narrates, but nope (in fact, his role ends up being pretty damn superfluous, and that's coming from a Matt Damon fan). Then you'd think maybe Jason Patric, who plays Lt. Charles Gatewood, would be worth really going into, not so much. About the only meat we get out of him is seeing him in-action (impressive, don't get me wrong) and hearing he's got a wife and kid back in Virginia. What about Geronimo (Wes Studi)? Nah, not even he's really human. He's too mythic. Adding to the list of important/nifty historical characters are Gene Hackman (General Crook) and Robert Duvall (Al Sieber). Interesting for historical value, though I hear there are problems there, too. However, any movie that makes me think "Is it going to be over soon?" gets little recommendation from me, regardless of a wonderful cast.

Sunday, September 17, 2006

Welcome the Camiiness

More good news-my pal Camii is joining the blog!

We've known each other for (counts on fingers) about five years now, though we've only known each other in person for a few months. Back in high school, a new girl came to town and ended up in my psychology class. My first memory of her is a tie-dye T-shirt. She only stayed for a few months, thanks to her mom moving for a new job, but we've been penpals ever since. Weird, aint it? To have a genuine penpal in a technological age, but there's something wonderful about a handwritten letter that e-mail just can't quite capture.

Anyway, I thought I'd add her to the peanut gallery and she graciously accepted. So now here she is.

Apollo's Lyre-update

"Thanks for making the change. I think it makes it more clear.
I'd like to accept the story for our October issue."
-Kimberly Brown, flash fiction editor for Apollo's Lyre

Yay!

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Irony

"I'm a world-class assasin, fuckhead. How do you think I found out?"
-Mr. Goodkat, Lucky # Slevin

Last week, Steve Irwin died from being stabbed by a stingray. This week, people in Australia are killing and mutilating stingrays. Coincidence? I think not. Dumbass people. http://http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/14795639/?GT1=8506

Movie Review: Lucky # Slevin. Just before we watched this, my guy made a comment that in this movie, Bruce Willis had better make up for not killing the first lady in The Jackal. He did. To talk about the plot might be dropping hints, so I'll skip that part, save to say "Pay attention." Otherwise, we're dealing with exotic and weird sets, a scattered but well-wrought story, and a top-notch cast. My favorites: Bruce Willis, Josh Hartnett, and Morgan Freeman. Other notables are Lucy Liu and Sir Ben Kingsley. This is not a movie for the squeamish-though it's mostly blood vs. genuine gore-and it is a movie for anyone who loves dialogue. Here are some quotes, pulled from imdb.com:

Slevin: Who are you?
The Boss: I'm The Boss.
Slevin: I thought he was The Boss.
The Boss: Why? Do we look alike?

Slevin's Girlfriend: [after Slevin walks in on her cheating on him] This is an accident.
Slevin: What, Like... He tripped, you fell?

The Rabbi: You must be Mr. Fisher.
Slevin: Must I be? Because it hasn't been working out for me lately.

Mr. Goodkat: The reason I'm in town, in case you're wondering, is because of a Kansas City Shuffle.
Man: What's a Kansas City Shuffle?
Mr. Goodkat: A Kansas City Shuffle is when everybody looks right, you go left.
Man: Never heard of it.
Mr. Goodkat: It's not something people hear about. Falls on deaf ears mostly. This particular one has been over twenty years in the making. No small matter. Requires a lot of planning. Involves a lot of people. People connected by the slightest of events. Like whispers in the night, in that place that never forgets, even when those people do. It starts with a horse.

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

And Cookies for All!

"Good news, everyone!"
-Herbert Farnsworth, Futurama

About a week ago, I submitted a flash fiction piece to an E-zine recognized in Writer's Digest, Apollo's Lyre. Realistically, this is the first "professional" submission I've made. So it was great to open the e-mail reply from Kimberly Brown and see that the first line was, "I liked this piece. It was touching, and kind of heartbreaking. Nice imagery, too." She followed with a suggested revision and said if I edited, she'd like to take another look. Her response makes me very optimistic, and I sent her a revised version of the piece just a few minutes ago. I'm hopeful that she'll accept it. Even though it's a non-paying venue, it's still a professional one. As an added bonus, an acceptance to Apollo's Lyre will mean Jayne owes me baked goods for her challenge at the beginning of the year.

I also realized that September is almost half way over already, which means it's almost time for me to move. The new house is just a few blocks away from where I'm currently living, but since it's not right on the interstate and at least twice as big, it's kind of a big deal. Oh yeah, and it has a dishwasher, too! Also, on Oct. 7th, I'm planning a psuedo-housewarming party. Psuedo because while it's in honor of my new house, because I'll finally be living somewhere big enough to have people over, I'm not calling it a housewarming party because I don't want people to feel like they have to bring a present. If everything works out just right, I'll get an acceptance at Apollo's Lyre, which means Jayne owes me baked goods, so then Jayne can bring cookies for my party. See how that works? It's beautiful.

Also handy, with Apollo's Lyre, is the "Pub Venues" section listing magazines and other publishers taking submissions. I started going through the list a few days ago, and I'm feeling like it's a good time to start sending stuff off into the ether. Wish me luck.

Movie Review: Elizabeth. Cate Blanchett is one of the few actresses who'll make me want to see a movie just because she's in it. Co-star Joseph Fiennes isn't bad either, but Geoffrey Rush steals the show as Sir Francis Walsingham. Walsingham is a great example of why Geoffrey Rush is a wonderful, wonderful actor. The movie is great at showing the intrigue, conspiracies, etc. that surrounded Elizabeth, but I was disappointed that it only covered the first four or so years of her 40+ year reign. I can see why they narrowed the focus, but when the movie ended, I was surprised. There are a lot of good, meaty moments. However, I find I'm not so adamantly in love with this movie as others I know. Worth seeing, though, either way.

Monday, September 11, 2006

First Day of Fall

I hope the exit is joyful and I hope never to return.
–Last entry of Frida Kahlo’s journal.

Today during my lunch break I went outside and laid under a tree for a while, just staring up and letting my mind wander. For the first time, it really felt like fall. Last year, this time, I was busy all the time, taking a pottery class, and doing my senior seminar.

I try to think what it is I love about fall so much. Maybe it’s the implicit quiet. Plants are shutting down, animals are storing up fat, the days are getting shorter, and there’s more solitude all around. The smells, too, I love the smells. The first bits of chimney smoke, moldering leaves on the ground, the chill in the air. Another reason I love fall: the beginning of October is when my guy and I started dating-we’ve been together almost three years now.

Movie Review: Bride and Prejudice. Though it’s blatantly corny in parts, there’s also a lot of good dialogue. The updates of the novel are interesting, too. Whereas Austen’s book had class distinction as a conflict, this film uses culture instead. Aishwarya Rai plays Lalita (the Indian version of Lizzy) and is a wonderful embodiment of the original, feisty Jane Austen character. Martin Henderson steps in as Darcy, and Naveen Andrews plays Balraj (a.k.a. Bingley). Great performances and wonderful visuals (sets, costumes, and handsome actors) are alone worth watching the movie.

Movie Review:
Frida. I was familiar with some of Kahlo’s art before watching the movie, but I wasn’t a huge fan of it. After watching the movie, I’m looking at her stuff in a new light. Kahlo was a hugely autobiographical artist, so now knowing about her life informs what I see a great deal. Anyway-the movie itself. Salma Hayek and Alfred Molina are excellent and the director did wonderful things with the visuals-she implants some very surreal moments that she actually manages to pull off. Nifty shit, dude. Watch the movie.

Thursday, September 07, 2006

Heroes

"What are you still doing here?"
-Dr. Forsyth

I just ran into my Anthropology professor in the hallway of the Psych. building. He was rather surprised to see me, needless to say. I was pretty entertained. I had to tell him I was still hanging about the place for the sake of an M.A. He asked me if I was still seeing "that young man," my guy had an Anthro class the semester before last, then he dashed off to his office hours, or next class, or such. It's funny, I was just thinking I should stop by Dr. Forsyth's office and say hello. He's one of my favorite professors and was gone last semester on sabbatical.

In other news, I just finished the first season of Highlander last night. Adieu, Darius. Somehow, death just won't go away this week. Werner Stocker, who played Darius, was wonderful. Unfortunately, he also had a brain tumor. Darius, who was originally intended as a long term character, was killed off due to the actor's failing health. The cast & crew's knowledge of Stocker's death is very evident in the episode with regard to the way Darius' death was handled. They're really saying goodbye to Stocker as much as to a character. It helps excuse some of the overdone bits in the episode.

I've been thinking of why I like Highlander so much. Sure Adrian Paul is a lot of fun to look at, but the plots have a strong leaning toward the cheesy, and they bring up issues in one episode which they abruptly drop in the next, and there's too much emphasis on "good vs. evil" where the bad guys are just that. Also, there's a lack of larger story arcs. For the most part, any plot begun in an episode is ended in that same episode. I just keep thinking of what Highlander would have been like with Joss Whedon doing the driving. Yet, at the same time, I tend to like it just as it is.

Superficially, it's fun to have the flashbacks and sword fights. More than that, the crime/detective element is interesting. As much as Duncan is a hero, he's often just as much a private detective and bodyguard. The key, I think, is that he is a hero. Not in the "cop dies in the line of duty" kind of way, but in the mythic/chivalric way. He is the epitome of an epic kind of hero. He fights the good fight, protects the helpless, and abides by a strict moral code-a code which, in one episode, even led him to protect a rapist from the victim's father. As an added bonus, he's also (so far anyway) strictly faithful to his lady love, despite the numerous cute girlies who pop up and throw themselves at him.

I find I'm fascinated with heroes right now. You get everything from a Hercules, to a Duncan MacLeod to a Mal Reynolds, or even a Spike, and yet they're all "heroes." The funny thing is, anymore it seems hard to find the epitomal hero in books or TV or Movies. There's such a huge push for heroes to be "flawed" and "human." The reason, of course, is perfect heroes are boring: see Hercules: The Legendary Journeys. Which is why MacLeod is interesting, he comes so close to the "perfect" hero, yet manages to escape doom of being boring. The salvation, there, can be chalked up mostly to his tendency to be cocky or a bit of a womanizer, (primarily in certain flashbacks, since he's totally loyal to Tessa currently).

A note on the side: I looked up Adrian Paul and found out that he started out as a dancer and choreographer. Go figure, eh? Though, I'm sure it helped out in the show as far as choreographing fights went. Like Serenity and Summer Glau prove, dance skills translate pretty well to fighting skills. So there you go, Adrian Paul is so badass as Duncan because of his experience wearing tights.

Monday, September 04, 2006

Joss and Hugo

Super exciting news to off-set the dire tone of my last post: Serenity won the Hugo Award!

Though Joss was not there in person to claim the award, Morena Baccarin passed on his words to the audience. Here's the clip:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_LYbtWdMpp4

Go Joss! Go BDM! I'm quite happy that this little "no big deal" movie is still going strong. As an added bonus, winning the Hugo will help spread the word the 'verse is a force to be reckoned with.

Mortalitas

“He died doing what he loved best and left this world in a happy and peaceful state of mind. He would have said, ’Crocs Rule!”’
-John Stainton, as quoted by MSNBC
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/14663786/?GT1=8506

Big news: The Crocodile Hunter is dead. Stingray barb to the heart. Mean though it is to say it, I have to: Is anyone surprised that he was killed by wildlife? After all those moments of him holding a vastly toxic snake by the tail, or wrestling a crocodile, etc. you kind of figure it was bound to happen sooner or later, don't you? All the same, I have to admit he did a lot of good things for nature, and he ultimately was a pretty admirable man in many ways (though I don't count common sense among them).

A bit of news rather closer to home is the CDOT accident that happened a few days ago. http://www.denverpost.com/news/ci_4263919
My dad works for CDOT, he started on the sign crew and is now in the body shop, and knew Chuck (Charles). Dad says he was a really nice guy who was always in a good mood, and he invited my dad to come hunt on his property. I feel very bad for his wife, who's expecting kid #1 soon. As if losing your husband wasn't bad enough, now top that with all the stress of a newborn. Ouch. The good news is, there looks to be a lot of community support, and the Colorado State Employees Credit Union is taking donations for the family.

One more death to talk about is that of my dog. We got her when I was ten, she's been MY dog for most of that, and tomorrow she's going to be put to sleep. Her health's been speeding downhill for about a month now, and she's gotten to the point where she can't even breathe well, much less get around. I went to visit my parents yesterday and it hurt to watch her and to see what horrible shape she's in. I'm glad she won't be hurting much longer, but I'm sad to loose her, just the same.

It's just not a good time for the mortality rates, is it?

Wednesday, August 30, 2006

TOFOG, School, and Publishing

Deb: “Here.”
Me: “What is it? Oh!” [Huge smile] “Deb, I love you!”
-Deb giving me a copy of the only-downloadable My Hand, My Heart, the newest Russell Crowe album which was produced by none other than Alan Doyle of Great Big Sea.

It’s that time of year again, when all us good boys and girls go back to classes. I’ve got a Monday night class (Development of the Novel) and a Thursday night class (Lit. Theories). One class should be fun, though it requires that I read Pride and Prejudice within a period of about four days (I read 143 pages yesterday). The other, Lit. Theories, will be a real pain in my ass. I’m not at all looking forward to it.

In other English major news, there was a party at David’s house Friday in honor of his return from spending a month in Italy. Most of the gang showed and I didn’t go home until after one o’clock. I also found out that David’s most recent book has just been published. He gave me an autographed copy with a personal note inside, and I’m about half way through it. Prose poetry all the way through, very interesting, and a departure for him as he’s been a more “traditional” poet up until now.

Book Review:
The Prayers of Others, by David Keplinger. I’m quite liking it. Prose poetry is a very interesting form and the pieces in this book are the best of what David does. Here’s an excerpt:

ONLY THE PRAYERS of others can save me. Likewise, mine save only them. The little girl who lost her tooth went looking for it through the house. Had she swallowed it last night? Her thinking and the house were large. She flung a piece of string, as though to lasso the tooth, as though it were a loose, wild beast that must be tamed. We’d do anything to comfort her.”

I suck at hyperlinks, or else I’d add the one that takes you to the book site. If you google the title, though, you can find it easily.

Another exciting bit-I’m going to be published this fall in the Hungry Eye, the university Literary Magazine. I’ve got two flash fiction pieces that have been selected and I’m mundo excited about the fact that, as of October, I will be a professionally published writer. No, there’s no money in it, but it’s still my name in print.

Swing Heil!

Annie O'Shea: But he's never told a lie in his life.
Jackie O'Shea: Well, he's making up for it now.
-Waking Ned Devine

I’m a bit irked with Netflix at the moment, because they’re lagging and where before if I sent a movie back on Monday, I would get one by Wednesday, right now it’s not the case. I sent one back Saturday and two Monday, and I won’t be getting any of them until tomorrow (Thursday). I want my movies! In the meantime, here are the latest.

Movie Review: Waking Ned Devine. A very fun movie that combines lots of “local color” and comedy with some nice tender moments. Also, there’s a scene where a sixty some year old man is riding down the road on a motorcycle while totally naked-save shoes. Any movie with that in it is worth a watch.

Movie Review: Swing Kids. I’ve heard of this one for a long time, and finally watched it. Boy, it’s good. Robert Sean Leonard is fantastic as Peter, and Christian Bale likewise does a great job as Thomas. An added bonus is the appearance of Kenneth Branagh as a Gestapo officer. While there are definitely uncomfortable moments in the movie, they’re well done and it’s fascinating to watch a story about Nazi Germany from the P.O.V. of the teenagers who couldn’t escape the politics. Talk about making extremely hard decisions, yeesh.

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

A New Low

“It hurts us.”
-Gollum

My guy suggested we go see Pulse yesterday, and I agreed on the condition of also getting dinner. After all, the previews actually creeped me out a bit and I was optimistic that the movie wouldn't completely suck. So much for optimism.

Movie Review: Pulse. Without a doubt, the most boring horror flick I’ve ever seen. Very heavy-handed, to boot. We start out with a college boy walking all paranoid-like around campus, the camera lingers meaningfully on people’s laptops, PDAs, cell phones, etc. My God! They’re all around us! He dies, sort of. His girlfriend and her techno addicted friends realize something’s wrong. They run around a lot and die. For some reason, running away works for the girlfriend, but no one else-don’t ask me why. Otherwise, there’s no way at all to fight the ghosties. You must, apparently, be blonde to survive. The movie contradicts itself, goes off on completely irrelevant tangents, fundamentally doesn’t make sense, gets preachy as hell at the end, and doesn’t believe in turning on the lights anywhere. Ugh.

I hereby resolve that the next time I go to the movie theater, it sure as hell won't be for a horror flick.

Monday, August 21, 2006

Shades of Armageddon

“It wasn't a dark and stormy night. It should have been, but there's the weather for you. For every mad scientist who's had a convenient thunderstorm just on the night his Great Work is complete and lying on the slab, there have been dozens who've sat around aimlessly under the peaceful stars while Igor clocks up the overtime.”
-Good Omens, by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman

Today is my first day back on the campus job and when I walked into the Psych. building I was greeted by the sight of an armageddon. The school is known for its impressively large cricket population-they wander down the halls, through the classrooms, and into the bathroom. Today, it would seem the vast majority of that population is dead and scattered in the hall. I can only guess that, in honor of classes starting up again next week, someone called in an exterminator. It’s impressive, though, walking down the hall amid dozens of dead crickets. Just a little morbid.

My plan for yesterday was go to my folks’ house at noonish, plop in front of the TV, and watch Highlander with my brother and father. Instead, I arrived to find my brother and two extra cadets at the house. Six of us, all together, sat down to watch the first episode and my mom, who’s not a) a bit TV fan, and b) an action/violence fan, proceeded to grate my nerves by talking during the show. I didn’t go over to be social, I went over to watch the damn show on a big ass TV. She also interrupted to ask when we could go over to the Pine house because she and dad just finished doing the floor.

Then, we get over there and she’s all wanting me to fawn over how well the floor came out and be shocked and fucking amazed that it’s so wonderful. It’s a damn floor. We get back to the house, and my brother takes one of his cadet palls to Wal-Mart so dad, a rather quieter mom, and I watch the next episode without him. By the time my brother returned and we finished watching the third, and final, episode on the disc, I’m so ready to get the hell out of there, it’s not even funny. Gah. Sometimes, my mom is way too damn needy. I’m not the kind of person who handles that kind of needy well-thus the reason why I’m not going to produce offspring.

It doesn’t help my mom-situation that my dog is old and going down quickly-she just got diagnosed with doggy cancer. The dog, a basset/weiner-dog mix, has been in the family for twelve years and for most of that, she’s been my dog. Now, since I’ve moved out and cannot have a pooch, she’s still with my parents. I love her to death, but I know her days are numbered. My mom, however, is refusing to let her go. Worse, she expects me to be totally distraught about the whole thing. Let’s face it, the dog is very old, she can’t last forever. Not only that, but up until a few months ago, she was incredibly healthy. Her decline was pretty abrupt. At this point, I’m leaning on the side of putting her to sleep because seeing her limp around with her skeleton poking out is more painful than letting her be on her way. *sigh* In other news: here’s a movie review.

Bill Engvall: A Decade of Laughs. When the Netflix envelope said “Run Time: 16 Mins” I thought there must be some mistake, it wouldn’t be the first time at any rate. However, it turns out that someone decided to make a DVD less than twenty minutes long, with not extra features-except maybe some hidden ones. Don’t get me wrong, I love Bill Engvall, and the music videos were fun to watch, but as far as overall DVD quality goes, I was disappointed. Fortunately, there should be another Highlander disc in my mailbox by the time I get home to help ease my pain.

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